Clients that want to "Hang Out as Friends", thoughts please

[Classysexxx]

Nope never for me.

It's not Healthy.

Period.

The end

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Unless your attending a Social or something together?

The only way this would ever be healthy is if that Friend did like you mentioned when push comes to shove help in any form without question or if you would,also be there for them without a blink of an eye like friends do.

I'm not saying hobbyists do not make great friends but yes only in the hobby.

I vote no...
And be firm in separating the two so no feelings are hurt in the future?
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[MsFijiWater]

Hard pass.

[Universal]

A house of a divided partisan.
still watching the opinions without judgement

[mathguy]

Hard pass.

When you say hard pass what do you mean girly? Just trying to understand whatcha meant with respect to Uni's post. Do you mean hard pass on friends or hard pass on something beyond friends? Just curious is all. xoxo

Nope never for me.

It's not Healthy.

Period.

The end

����

Unless your attending a Social or something together?

The only way this would ever be healthy is if that Friend did like you mentioned when push comes to shove help in any form without question or if you would,also be there for them without a blink of an eye like friends do.

I'm not saying hobbyists do not make great friends but yes only in the hobby.

I vote no...
And be firm in separating the two so no feelings are hurt in the future?
��

I totally respect your right to separate the two but I don't think it's fair to say that it's "not healthy". Ya don't think that's a bit strong? :/ I wouldn't call it "unhealthy". Mine have been perfectly healthy. Certainly as healthy as the hobby could possibly be anyway (if we really want to get down to it).

The reason I mention it is not to disrespect your choice, not at all, I absolutely respect that, but you said at one point, "The only way this would ever be healthy is if that Friend did like you mentioned when push comes to shove.......".

But, see, that's exactly what real friends do. They do that because a friendship is built on give & take & common interests or attraction (not just sexual attraction - even hetero males can be "attracted" to other hetero males b/c they want to emulate them, be as successful as them, as smart, as good looking, have shared interests.....). The strength of the friendship is based on that level of give & take, along with how much time has transpired through that shared history. Very similar to family.

For example, if you went to jail for a DWI and a friend bailed you out on bond they likely are not doing this a few days after you've both met or even after becoming friends for a few weeks or a month or hanging out with each other for awhile. On the other hand if you have both been through many things together, over a long time, shared many trials & tribulations together, various pains, successes, etc... and have given/taken from one another in equitable amounts, then that's a strong friendship where this very likely could be expected.

It's totally within someone's right to separate them. TONS of guys would never in a million years entertain the types of relationships I've had (whether sexual/romantic or simply plain 'ol friends). I definitely think many more girls feel that way as well. But I wouldn't call it unhealthy for those that choose otherwise OR happened to have otherwise develop. IJS. Mainly on that part about the healthiness aspect.

[Universal]

It's not healthy, I think Classy is talking about mixing business (escort work)with personal affairs and the end result leads to being used for sex without a true friendship. People can take advantage of someone that is wanting a true friend.
Guys bond with other men and go on fishing trips, help each other with mechanical & building projects but sex isn't part of the friendship, unless it's something similar to the movie, Brokeback Mountain.
Would you stay friends with a man that wanted sex from you and you are a heterosexual male?

Edited for a missing comma

[mathguy]

It's not healthy, I think Classy is talking about mixing business (escort work)with personal affairs and the end result leads to being used for sex without a true friendship. People can take advantage of someone that is wanting a true friend.
Guys bond with other men and go on fishing trips, help each other with mechanical & building projects but sex isn't part of the friendship, unless it's something similar to the movie, Brokeback Mountain.
Would you stay friends with a man that wanted sex from you and you are a heterosexual male?

Edited for a missing comma

Well definitely if you are being used for sex. For sure that's not a healthy relationship.

What I was is saying is more along the lines that we all use each other to some extent. Even a marriage is just a couple of people who give and take to a point that they've agreed they want to spend their life together b/c of how they feel about each other and what they gain emotionally or whatnot from said relationship (which is the give/take). Change the dynamics though, take away some of the give and take, man or the woman is no longer attracted to the other, take away sex (either side), no helping clean the house, someone who won't work on finances anymore, won't work at all, gets a drug addiction, uses all money on gambling, steals things to support it, etc... etc... then the "love" (i.e. insanely intense romantic "friendship") goes away.

The only kind of relationship where a truly truly unselfish and totally absolutely bonafide 100% altruistic love or caring exists (with absolutely zero expectation of *anything* in return) is parent/child. Outside of that it's all how much you give and take.

Even a lifelong brother or sister can be forgotten and left to be on their own if they keep pissing on the family enough. No friendship or relationship is truly unconditional (with only exception being parent/child).

But, yes, I'd agree it would be unhealthy if a woman were simply being used for sex. I suppose that's what a lot of guys would end up doing :/ That has not been the case for me in the few relationships I recall (one very recent....romantic and still ongoing real life very good friendship too). But yes I do get whatcha mean about the possibility of being used for sex. Many guys probably would do that.

From that aspect it would not be a healthy relationship or friendship, true indeed. Great topic though and food for thought Uni!

[Lovinglifeinaustin]

If we lived in a different culture, one where sex was not so demonized and marginalized, then perhaps friendships among clients and providers might work well. But in the world we live in today, I think it’s wise and safer to separate friend relationships from business relationships.

I’ve met some wonderful women in this unholy realm, but I would be a fool to think that any of them are interested in a friend relationship with me.

[Krystal_RoseBBW]

I have a very good friend that was once a very regular client. The evolution of our relationship wasn't exactly discussed. It just happened naturally.

We do still sometimes have sex, but they are paid sessions and are scheduled accordingly. He respects me enough to not ask me to work for free.
If we are just hanging out, it is understood that if "work" comes up (and if I can't afford to pass) that takes precedence. He understands that, sometimes, my "job" has me "on call" and I have responsibilities.

I also have another client that I have known nearly 16 years. Every once in a while, we go for some sushi after a session as just friends. He never pressures for more and understands if I cannot linger too long over the meal.

My ex husband was a client before he was my husband. Then he was a client again for a short while. Now, we are just very good friends (w/out benefits) LOL

These are TRUE friends in that I know that they are each someone I can turn to for a sympathetic ear when I am in need and I am the same for them.

[Guest 011723-1]

It's not healthy, I think Classy is talking about mixing business (escort work)with personal affairs and the end result leads to being used for sex without a true friendship. People can take advantage of someone that is wanting a true friend.
Guys bond with other men and go on fishing trips, help each other with mechanical & building projects but sex isn't part of the friendship, unless it's something similar to the movie, Brokeback Mountain.
Would you stay friends with a man that wanted sex from you and you are a heterosexual male?

Edited for a missing comma

This is what I was referring to with my previous response. He can say he's a friend and when push comes to shove he just disappears. I'm saying that because it happened to me.