Quote Originally Posted by Illini View Post
I know it has been said before. But I dont think it can be said enough. Thank you ladies for what you do.

I am here because I am a middle aged single guy who cant figure out what Im doing in the dating scene. I am not here looking to date anyone. But I am here to get to have a dating experience. In part because it?s fun. And also because it keeps me from getting too desperate in the dating scene and do things Id regret.

I had a wonderful time with a gal last night. I had the ability to help her with a couple of errands. We had a nice conversation. And some fun, for me at least, in bed. It was like nice nights I remember from relationships past.

And it?s just so nice. In the moment of being with her it was fun. It reminded me of how good it can be to have someone in my life and made me want to get back out and try dating again so I can find that special someone. She helped me to feel attractive and desirable (to a degree, I?ve got self esteem issues!!).

We all find ourselves here for different reasons. For me it?s to hopefully find a bridge to any meaningful relationship. I suspect there are other guys that are like me here. For me it helps so much to hear that someone finds something attractive about me. That they are interested in what I think about something. Or even at times to feel like I?m actually seen and acknowledged.

Sometimes what you gals do is really amazing and I hope you know that you are much appreciated. I know it doesn?t always seem like that reading these boards. That?s the anonymous internet for you. But a heartfelt thank you to my friend from last night. The others I?ve seen before. And all the rest I haven?t. Sometimes you gals make a huge difference in a persons life
OK, just my 2 cents after hobbying more than 20 years. I understand how you feel, but I wouldn't look at the hobby as a bridge to any meaningful relationship. It is their job to make us feel good for the hour. Some are way better at it than others. They're not going to tell you you're ugly or need to lose weight. If you have self esteem issues (who hasn't), then work on what you think are your weak points. Maybe it means hitting the gym more, or different haircut, or a different wardrobe. Being physically fit can boost self esteem big time. Engaging in the hobby too much can get in the way of finding a true relationship, although I have a hobby friend who only sees providers and has no interest in a gf. Don't get me wrong, I love the hobby, but it's always been in addition to an SO, so I've never had any false notion that providers look at us as anything but a job. Sure, they can like you a lot, but guess what, they still want your $, which is how it's supposed to be.