Event: the Dotard farts.
Reactions:
CNN - apples, oranges, and bananas do not fart.
MSNBC - POTUS launches chemical attack on his own citizens.
Spicer - biggest, best fart of all time. And, it smelled like roses. And, it made a rainbow, the biggest best rainbow of all time. The rainbow included colors never seen before. I was blinded, and cried, because of its beauty.
FN - POTUS solves Nitrogen, Hydrogen, etc. shortages single-handedly.
OH2 - POTUS did not shart: another glorious win for the GPOAT.
