Ads that say "No AA" And this African American mans Experience as a New Hobbyist

[deesmooth]

Now let me preference the question I ask below by saying, I respect everyones preference or right to see who they want to see. I sure as hell respect a lady's right to choose who she is willing to share her body with. Hell, we all have preferences whether we want to admit it or even know it.

Now let me preference the question I ask below by saying, I respect everyones preference or right to see who they want to see. I sure as hell respect a lady's right to choose who she is willing to share her body with. Hell, we all have preferences whether we want to admit or even know it.

Ok, my questions is for all you ladies who post in your ads "NO AA" or for all you ladies who don't post it but don't see "AA". By the way, still being somewhat new to the "Hobby World", I just I found out about 2 weeks or so ago that "No AA" means no African American men.

My question for you ladies that don't see African American men is, why don't you?

As I said before, I respect every ladies preference to choose who she wants to spend her time with or give her body to. I am asking the question because I am honestly curious about the reasons why.

I want to start with the story of my very first attempt to meet up with a lady. After reading so many reviews on different ladies. I found one that I liked particularly because the reviews talked about how she was "newbie friendly". I finally got up the nerve to reach out so I texted her and set up a time to meet at her incall location. I get there and she was is a very attractive lady. I get out of my car and start to walk towards her and I can immediately tell she was not expecting to see me. We sat for quite a while talking and I finally asked her if she was ok because it was getting very awkward and uncomfortable. She said, "well, I don't see African American men." Needless to say, I was caught off guard because it was honestly the last thing I expected her say. So, I said to her, "It's ok, I can tell you are really uncomfortable. I am going to take off and I am sorry this was such an awkward situation for you."

I leave and I am very perplex about the situation and quite honestly, didn't know what to think. Now because if that experience, I ask this question, "Are you ok with seeing a professional African American man?" I don't only ask this question to the white providers I have reached out to, I have also asked it to the African American providers. Yes, I have seen ads from African American ladies that say, "No AA".

I recently asked a lady who does see "AA" the question I proposed up top to all the ladies. She very willingly gave me two answers. The first answer I got was "a lot of girls don't want to see African American men because they have had bad experiences with them or they are thugs and pimps." The second answer I got was that "they are too big and the ladies don't want to deal with that."

The first thing that came to mind was, "I am sure ladies have had bad experiences with white men as well, but because they are white it is acceptable? The second thing that came to mind was not every white man has a small dick, just like every black man has a 12" dick.

This made for a very interesting conversation. So I asked her If she thought I was a thug or a pimp and her answer was and I quote, "Well, I didn't know you were African American until you asked me if I was ok with seeing a professional African American man. You didn't sound like a black guy on the phone; besides, you are a very good looking chocolate man." Now there are so many things wrong with that statement that I am not going to go into it.

I bring my question up honestly to understand. Is what she said true? The one thing she didn't mention was race as a reason why ladies won't see African American men. Yes, I have had some racial slurs thrown my way when I asked the question, "Are you ok with seeing an African American man." Maybe she was naive and didn't think that would be the case or maybe she just didn't want to admit that part because she thought it would hurt my feelings. I haven't had very many experiences since I joined OH2 and ECCIE three weeks ago. However, I have read so many ads where ladies say "No AA, No pimps, No thugs." I think to myself, is this how these ladies see or think of African American men?

Well, not every African American man is thug or a pimp and we don't all have 12' dicks. Most of us are highly educated and are professionals who do very well in our careers and treat ladies well and with respect.

For those few ladies I have been lucky enough spend time with, I say thank you. Hopefully the experience we had will let you know that at least this African American man knows how to have fun and treat a lady with respect.

[newbieguy]

Deesmooth, you admit that you are new, so you arent aware that this topic has probably been discussed a dozen times over. If curious, you could probably do a search on here or ecc and find them. However, you pretty much summarized all of the reasons, or the ones you will hear. There may be other reasons, but at the end of the day, it is what it is. The hobby is its own little eclectic world; so you gotta take the good, the bad, and the ugly.

[3daygetaway]

Someday it won’t matter anymore. Until then maybe there’s solace in knowing for every provider who doesn’t want a black man, there are a dozen civies who fantasize about you.

I try not to see providers with an AA policy on principle, even though I’m Anglo. Solidarity, Brother.

[DallasRain]

I have a NO AA policy but not on color ...on attitude
No arrogant assholes

[deesmooth]

Thank you for answering. I completely understand and no lady should have to deal with any asshole and should always be respected.

[deesmooth]

Thanks for the reply. That first experience caught me off guard because there was nothing in the ad that said anything about it. I didn't know what to think at that point other than how to make her not feel so uncomfortable about situation. I became way more aware after that. As the father of beautiful bi-racial kids, I truly respect everyone's right and preference to be with whomever they choose. The whole point of my question was based on whether a provider sees an African American man assume we are all thugs and pimps. I avoid those ladies who don't but it's the ones that don't put it in their ad so I would have no idea unless I should up which was the problem with my first experience.

[deesmooth]

Thanks for the reply. That is exactly how I feel about it and was just curious based on my first experience. It's not the ladies that post it that I am concerned with it's the one that don't. It's a situation I definitely don't want to be in again. Like you said, it is what it is.

[sweetbabybeth]

I'm sorry you had to experience that. Its hurtful. I'm Caucasian but my boys are not and ive experienced a lot of racism bc of my boys being mixed. It used to hurt my feelings even thought hey didn't know what was going on at the time, I felt outraged many times. I don't care what color you are. If you are a respectable man then that's all that really matters here to me. You will be fine. Tons of beautiful ladies here see African American Gents.. From your post you seem pretty mature and respectful.
Just my 2 pennies
Beth

[Lovinglifeinaustin]

WHAT? AA means African American?

I thought it meant Alcoholics Anonymous.

But seriously, racism permeates all of our institutions, including this one.
Those of us who grew up in the 50s and 60s remember the signs in the diners that said: “ We reserve the right to refuse service to anyone.” Same thing here. It’s sad and unfortunate. Our culture hasn’t grown and evolved enough yet.

We shall overcome...I hope.

[deesmooth]

Thank Beth.

[saustin]

Unfortunately, it is stereotyping. And it is a form of risk management based on their or other's experience.

[deesmooth]

I completely agree with you and I feel badly for those ladies that have had to deal with that crap. It is exactly why I posed the question. It was purely based on my experiences so far. As I mentioned in the post, I respect all of these ladies and I definitely respect their right and/preference to be with whom every they choose.

[Caseykk]

I used to see AA men and now only see the AA men that are regulars because I just had an AA male try and rob me and take back HIS donation. He left and staked outside of my hotel room waiting for me to leave, but honestly if an Aa guy shows up and seems respectful yet I didn’t know he was AA I’d still probably see him, a lot of girls I know who do this won’t see AA men because of just bad experiences or they always get haggled. Damn how many times did I say AA lol. Love my chocolate men tho ;)

[Lovinglifeinaustin]

I used to see AA men and now only see the AA men that are regulars because I just had an AA male try and rob me and take back HIS donation. He left and staked outside of my hotel room waiting for me to leave, but honestly if an Aa guy shows up and seems respectful yet I didn’t know he was AA I’d still probably see him, a lot of girls I know who do this won’t see AA men because of just bad experiences or they always get haggled. Damn how many times did I say AA lol. Love my chocolate men tho ;)

I’ve read lots of stories about white guys stealing and haggling. But I’ve yet to see a woman refuse to see white guys because of it.

[DallasRain]

Regardless of race i am picky about who I see...as long as you pass my screening and have a respectful attitude then were gonna be all good.