So, in the spirit of full disclosure, I am already home from my PTSD retreat.

At the retreat, I did not like throwing bean bags and plastic balls. So the second day came, and I said I was not going to do it. She said I had to do it. I asked why and she said to gauge my reaction. I said, "You saw my reaction yesterday. I shake and cry and chase balls. I don't want to do it." So she said, "You''ll get a warning." I asked, "What's that mean?" I was told I couldn't go outside. We had just gotten 5" of snow. That sounded good to me. So I said, "Warn me up for the next week of gym." And it just went downhill from there.

I am not Catholic but I intend to find a good priest. And hope he does not get PTSD listening to me! I just wanna be told to say a few Hail Marys and I'm good to go! No bean bags involved! Throw in more yoga and meditation. Joined a gym. Fingers crossed.

Thanks to everyone who reached out in kindness, asking how I was doing. You are good humans.

"I have not failed. I've just found 10,000 ways that won't work." ~ Thomas Edison