Amber's wisdom memorialized
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Originally posted by Bustygirl
Ladies: Remember that EVERY person you come into contact with can/will have some effect on your reputation. Lying or misrepresenting yourself will only bite you in the butt in the end. For EVERY type of woman in this country I can almost guarantee there are those out there who are into her.....so focus your marketing on the ones who WILL like you, then neither your rep, nor his wallet are damaged due to issues.
DO NOT be afraid to "turn down" appointments if you are TRULY uncomfortable. If you know you will not be comfortable, chances are good HE will not have fun. That leads to him feelings ripped off, potential for negative PR for you, and discomfort for both. MOST men would prefer to hear "I know I am probably being silly...but I just do not feel comfortable with this, and do not want to waste your hard earned money. I have to be comfortable for you to be happy with your decision, and I just don't feel comfortable right now" over having you try to fake your way through an appointment that is giving you the heebie jeebies and wind up feeling like they are spending time with Mr Roboto.
Look for the BEST in everyone. Maybe all men are not the Tom Cruise, Brad Pitt types....but guess what? Some have amazing eyes....some have soft hands...some nice voices. Find something about the men you meet that you genuinely like, and focus your attention on that.
Remember that on the forums, at socials, anywhere you are observed by others, you can/will do things that will be discussed later. If you consider yourself a professional, then you MUST consider that the expectations for this profession include hygiene, safety, discretion, and courtesy.
If you require prozac, take it :P
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Originally posted by Bustygirl
OOOPS one last addition: both ladies AND gents: If you are visiting someone in their own turf.....BE DISCRETE. Do not behave or say things that will be likely to embarrass or out them to neighbors. Karma has a way of coming around in the end....so if you wish your rights to be respected, respect others as well.
Seriously, a number of ladies that find themselves here have some issues. No one can blame you for those until they have walked a mile in your shoes. But if you come into public and flaunt lunatic ideas.....do not blame the members for being concerned, or the staff for shutting you down if you go too far. While membership here SEEMS huge, this community is a minor percentage of the city...most here will avoid those they see as unstable or ummmmm let's say goofy :)
Last but not least: DO NOT outright lie to men unless they ask you to. There is good in everyone on the planet. But MOST people, know themselves pretty well. Start trying to pour on FALSE flattery, and many will wind up feeling worse than if you kept your mouth shut. Give compliments that are honest and you mean. Better to tell a man how amazing his eyes are, than to compliment him on muscles he doesn't have. Trust me....he will smell the lies...and it will usually have a negative impact on his mood.
Guys:
Hygiene is also a MAJOR factor for you. The whole "Your Mileage May Vary" concept? If you stink or have stuff on you she feels the need to consult CSI over, she is probably gonna run out of gas pretty fast :)
Also....try to remember that women are raised much different than men. MOST of us....even those of us who "play tough"....are always going to be a bit nervous around men we do not know. Women are much easier to victimize than men....and most will be aware of that. Try to remember that and be considerate while she gets into her comfort zone knowing you are not one of the bad eggs.
If/when possible....try to leave pagers and cellphones outside. with todays easy access to camphones and such....some ladies are NOT going to be able to easily relax with those in the room. If you NEED to keep it with you, toss your shirt over it before she begins your massage :) She will be less nervous, and thus, your mileage will likely increase.
If you are there to simply have a relaxing time, so be it.
If you want to stand out, and be remembered: Hygiene is CRITICAL (yeah I said it before, but worth repeating). While some do not care one way or another....MANY ladies will feel MUCH more relaxed if you hand them a card with their fee inside it. Call it nuts, but it is hard to get into the "fun" mindset when someone just throws bills around.
Before you go: Be SURE to tell her if you have fragrance issues. MOST will refrain from using strongly scented lotions or perfumes that might cause you problems...but many newer ladies don't even give that a thought.
If you have any "pet peeves" do not be afraid to ask about them. As stated to the ladies....better for you to choose another lady than to try to force a square peg into a round hole, and both of you wind up unhappy.
Last but not least: unless the lady gives you some DIRECT indication that she wants a "relationship" with you, don't fall in love. Many of the ladies ADORE some of their guys as friends....but you will never even imagine how awkward it is to have to try to let a guy down gently when he forgets the boundaries, and winds up "falling in love".
She is there to make you feel better than when you arrived. But PLEASE do not assume that her being successful at that means she wants to marry you and have 8 kids.
Sorry this was so long....but had several questions in my PM box that made me think it might help. Since I am fully retired and domestic now, I can post the truth without fear :) [/B][/b][/quote]