:A tongue in (ass)cheek thread:
Post an ad with available hours in big bold font.... Get a PM to meet OUTSIDE those hours
Send an appointment request with three (3) references.... They all retired the week before
Have an album w/ twenty pics.... Get a text requesting face shots
Leave extra early so you'll be on time.... A/C goes out. Now ya smell like a wildebeest
Client passes screening flawlessly.... Smegma
Run a review special.... They are all NO's
After a heavy make-out session w/ the provider of your dreams; you proceed to go down on her.... Fish!!
1st appointment EVER.... Your father's boss
Client leaves you a birthday card.... Happy Birthday Karen in HR -Sign (insert company team members) *$25 Luby's gift card*
Getting hot & heavy 20 mins into a 90min visit.... Acid reflux
Previous client who left birthday card calls.... Ask for it back. Get's mad cause you kept the gift card
Take your wife to Del Frisco's for dinner.... Hostess call you by your 1st name & says "Oh, another new friend I see."
On a dinner date w/ client.... Never returns from restroom
Post em if ya got em. BTW only one of these is made up.... sadly