Referral etiquette

[CasualMNUFan]

I have a question about referral etiquette. I did a fair amount of hobbying in 2017-2019 with some incredible ladies. Due to Covid and a job change, I didn’t do much in 2020 and the early part of the year. I had a couple of ladies that told me I could always use them as a referral based on our time together and the positive reviews that I left them.

I had an opportunity to see a lady and she wanted a couple of referrals. I looked at at my list and gave her a couple of the ladies that said they would vouch for me. Within 15 mins I received a text from one of them berating me for using her as a referral because I hadn’t seen her in a couple of years.

What’s the point of saying you will be a referral when you want a positive review to help your standing only to chew me out for asking for the same?

[Guest 051123-1]

What’s the point of saying you will be a referral when you want a positive review to help your standing only to chew me out for asking for the same?

If you are or have been married, or are or have been in a long-term relationship with a woman, you should not be bewildered.

[Rgvrook]

Wow, that was really deep.

[Berry Skyes]

For me, it goes like this:

If I’ve seen him, numerous times, have established good rapport, he’s been a gentleman, he’s never pulled any weird bullshit or shorted me etc, he’ll get a good referral indefinitely. HOWEVER I will let the lady know it’s been X amount of time since I’ve see him if it’s been over 6 months so she can decide if that fits HER comfort parameters or not. Bada Bing.

To answer your question, some guys behave themselves for years then get squirrelly and act a fool with someone new. That’s probably why you got read the riot act OP- past experiences can be a real beotch and smack down the innocent on occasion. Hobby on.

[Guest 051123-1]

If I’ve seen him, numerous times, have established good rapport, he’s been a gentleman, he’s never pulled any weird bullshit or shorted me etc, he’ll get a good referral indefinitely.

Good on ya. I have spoken with many many ladies who have expressed their frustration at getting no response from other ladies about referrals. Guys, when you ask a lady for a referral, you should also confirm that she will respond to referral requests. It’s easy for a lot of girls to say, “Yeah, sure, baby. No problem,” just to end the conversation and get you out the door.

[CasualMNUFan]

For me, it goes like this:

If I’ve seen him, numerous times, have established good rapport, he’s been a gentleman, he’s never pulled any weird bullshit or shorted me etc, he’ll get a good referral indefinitely. HOWEVER I will let the lady know it’s been X amount of time since I’ve see him if it’s been over 6 months so she can decide if that fits HER comfort parameters or not. Bada Bing.

To answer your question, some guys behave themselves for years then get squirrelly and act a fool with someone new. That’s probably why you got read the riot act OP- past experiences can be a real beotch and smack down the innocent on occasion. Hobby on.

That’s totally fair. But would you the text said gentlemen who had seen you numerous times, had left you multiple positive review, and chew his ass out on text? Seemed odd to me.

[donghead]

Etiquette is about as common as common sense. Not sure how that is a surprise.

[Berry Skyes]

That’s totally fair. But would you the text said gentlemen who had seen you numerous times, had left you multiple positive review, and chew his ass out on text? Seemed odd to me.

I definitely would not do that, but everyone is different I guess.

I don’t screen with references at ALL- there are just too many ways it can and does go wrong. I’m happy to provide them to those who screen that way but for me personally, it’s an outdated and deeply flawed method that presents problems rather than practicalities.

[AlexandraSand]

For me, it goes like this:

If I’ve seen him, numerous times, have established good rapport, he’s been a gentleman, he’s never pulled any weird bullshit or shorted me etc, he’ll get a good referral indefinitely. HOWEVER I will let the lady know it’s been X amount of time since I’ve see him if it’s been over 6 months so she can decide if that fits HER comfort parameters or not. Bada Bing.

To answer your question, some guys behave themselves for years then get squirrelly and act a fool with someone new. That’s probably why you got read the riot act OP- past experiences can be a real beotch and smack down the innocent on occasion. Hobby on.

+1

I write everything about the encounter. And about verification process crazyness and make notes on how hobbyists commenting in chats later on. I will give any info, that I have on a guy to the asking girl. No matter the age of said information. But, I will never answer request for verification send as sms(because my number is private) or some email, because I have no idea, who is on the other line. PM only on the hobby site and I will answer ASAP.

In my opinion, guys who overstay without invitation are much worse than the clock watching girl - because they are swindling and cunning their way to get more freebies and manipulating a girl in to submission. I applaud girls, who are firm on their donation (that is not upsell - it is her minimal worth at this moment and in her opinion!) and to other girls, who don't post "real" pictures, because that is their prerogative and the way to have some security in this crazy world.

[ttmax]

My observations, is there or many awesome points in referrals here.... and staying safe is a two way precaution , even with referrals. I dislike when some providers take a picture without your consent, what car we drive, licensed plate, go through our pant pockets, our wallets, car keys, have someone go to our car while session is in progress, or have someone hide in in the incall... yes we need to be cautious even with verity hobbies and providers. A hobbies is more apt to hurt a beautiful provider but providers also can hurt....Good points from all the input.

[BlueChile]

My suggestion is to see your established list of previous companions, reconnect and Bada Bing your referrals are up to date!
Good Luck!

[Beldam]

One of the downfalls of the system I've seen about 10, asked them all to pm and I'm still not verified and not sure what to do about it, besides move on.

[Birdieman]

OP, just let it go. It’s the hobby. You win some you lose some. Hope you were able to see the lady you intended.