Reference checks???

[ATXLICKHER]

I have a question for the providers and hobbyist.
When asked for a reference check I dont know about you guys but the reference checks may take a few days or even a week or so and my question is if you have providers listed as friends on your profile can those be checked or confirmed? I mean the lady has to approve you as a friend when the notice is sent, is that correct? If that is confirmed can’t they just see that and also see that you are already verified? I’m just asking because in the good ole days the provider would look at either your reviews, for what you may enjoy and to confirm with that provider with out asking for references. Anyone have any input?

[3daygetaway]

Oh, they have PLENTY to opine about this topic but an “advanced search” with a longer search date range and the keyword screening or verification will yield pages on this subject and why you are mistaken.

[ATXLICKHER]

What am I mistaken about? It was a general question and I wanted some input and opinions.

[Mokoa]

I posted the following about this topic a while back so I will reiterate it.

https://home.ourhome2.net/showthread...l=1#post767454

Each lady has her own screening method that they are comfortable with. Once they establish that method, it is the only method they trust. Sites like P411 may be used as tools in that method but it is the method that they trust not any of the individual tools that method employs. You may have P411 OK's out the ass but that in no way guarantees you effortless screening by any lady. When engaging in a lady's screening process, the only thing that matters is that process. Being verified on other sites may or may not be relevant. It is her process that matters. Period.

You do not like that? Move on to someone else. Persisting after being informed of failing to screen and/or being told to cease contact may be interpreted as harassment or even stalking. There are very few things worse to these ladies than grown men whining like little boys because they were rejected.

Having moderated here and elsewhere for a decade I have seen the above play out over and over again. It always ends badly.

Always.

[Vera James]

This is why references are a last resort for me personally. Not only do I not care what your references have to say (lying, paid references, YMMV) but each time I reach out to one I make a point to temper my expectations. And by that I mean I treat it as a pleasant surprise if one responds within 48 hours, or at all.

[Chilipepper]

A reference is just one part of my screen. I do like to hear from the ladies because they include details about you and your demeanor but not all answer. So having other ways to screen you is important...at least for me.

[Victoria Columbari]

I do not accept references. Just because you behave for one gal does not mean you will for me and sometimes a lady doesn't get back and there are other reasons that I do not feel comfortable stating. I have a method. I completely understand if you do not wish to provide the information i ask for and will tell you to have a nice day if you do not want to screen.