Discretion!! Discretion!! Discretion!! Discretion!! Discretion!!

[TeonaMonroe]

The main objective to the game we play to be discreet.......

So here ago I had an incident a few days ago with a hobbyist.
This hobbyist will remain unnamed but he went back and told a different provider what happened how it happened in full detail. Why he felt like that was OK to do such a thing, I made in my points Before I even agreed to the session to be very very quiet about what I do and how I do. Unfortunately it did not go down how I requested. Not only have I heard this information from a provider, I’ve heard the information from another hobbyist!

Hobbies you guys have to stop comparing notes among the providers. It’s sloppy it’s inconsiderate and just completely disrespectful!
(“Well she did XYZ..... So why won’t you?”)
Just to be clear every provider is not the same and every provider do not provide the same services so you going to one provider telling her what another provider did is absurd!

[dodger]

There are legitimate reasons to share information ... I have no details about the situation which prompted you to post so I'm not talking about that instance. More generally we have reviews and providers quote and link to reviews in their ads. Providers request references ... same thing. I want the provider to be the source of info about her sessions, services, rates, etc. But the guy is the best source about how he felt, how he was treated (his opinion, granted). This because the connection with the provider is at least as important to me as anything else.

But there are things I will not share about my sessions because I think the provider controls those things ... and she has to right to decide who she does what with ,,, a provider makes decisions and these may vary from session to session, from client to client. I want to avoid the very "you did such and such with so and so, what about me!" that you mention.

We understand that ladies provide different services, different skills, different levels of interaction with different clients. In short, we understand that providers are people. Well, most of us understand that ... and you probably shouldn't book guys who don't understand. Having said that ... one of the primary purposes of this and other boards is to exchange info ... so it is going to happen.

Thing is, over time we all establish reputations ... and if one person says something it might have more or less credibility depending on the source. And here is a flash .... not everyone on this board tells the truth all the time. Feel free to disregard or dismiss all or part of what you hear ... and don't undervalue contradicting or denying what you hear about yourself or others.

FWIW, I tend to regard you as one of the intelligent, mature, and appealing people who use this board. But the kind of information exchange you describe, .... lady, it is going to happen. That is simply "working as designed". I regret that you had an upsetting experience ... not sure there is anything you can reasonably expect to change.

I hope you can see your way clear to shake it off ... and get back in the game. And remember .... denial isn't just a river in Egypt!

[Passion2015]

Remember guys in general like to brag and lie on their penis.

I for one never discuss 100% of activities during a session. Why? Because what happens in a session is between the provider and I except the common activities:)

[F117]

I have stopped seeing providers when they (unsolicited) started disclosing WAAAAY TOO MUCH INFO about fellow hobbyists.

Many providers also seem to have a competitive streak (I'm being kind) and like to talk trash about other providers bodies, enhancements, (FORBIDDEN SUBJECT), (FORBIDDEN SUBJECT), and (FORBIDDEN SUBJECT).

All the above is a no-go for me. If you run your mouth off about other hobbyists and providers, you will run your mouth off about me.

Please don't PM me wanting to know who - I don't kiss and tell, or do anything in an appointment and then tell.

Thanks!

[DocHoliday]

TM, you know some of these people can't STFU!!! Ladies and gentlemen should NOT be comparing notes and inquiring about other members activities. You are there for that meeting, with that person and with every meeting...YMMV!!!

Sorry to hear you had another member ruin your day.

[The Infamous One]

Cosa Nostra or eat the canoli. Pussy Mafia fo Life.

[Groovy Johnson]

Classic case of "Self Alert".

Now he won't be getting the sweet YMMV deals.
AND he just made the DNS list of at least one provider.

Not the sharpest knife in the drawer.

[AustinMack59]

Nothing is secret in this life. I had a member send me a very detailed description of your menu in the past. You need to be more careful what you offer to who. Not a good look to have that stuff floating around.

[NaughtyNaomi]

I completely agree it's sad that this has to be said in this industry but it's true. There should always be a bit of mystery with this. I recently had someone reach out to me regarding something that I do not offer on my menu. They said that they were told this by another hobbyist. Safety is the most important thing, and when people spread lies that can put us in danger. Companions and hobbyists alike.

[F117]

I completely agree it's sad that this has to be said in this industry but it's true. There should always be a bit of mystery with this. I recently had someone reach out to me regarding something that I do not offer on my menu. They said that they were told this by another hobbyist. Safety is the most important thing, and when people spread lies that can put us in danger. Companions and hobbyists alike.

AMEN!

[The Infamous One]

This is going to sounded very jaded, but it’s true. Most people are too self interested to care about how their indiscretion may effect another, especially providers. Clients don’t have to live with the consequences like we do. Some clients are naive and some just don’t value/respect women or providers. I’m too busy staying in my lane and worrying about my life and safety to care about what’s going on in other people’s worlds, for the most part. If you are not intelligent enough to discuss things and not people, please pass me on by. If I hear someone discussing someone’s business, that tells me how they’ll discuss me.

Everyone deserves mutual respect and discretion, unless they are a danger and hurting people. Even then, a lot of thought must be put into wether an alert or alleged danger should be posted and how etc.

My nickel’s worth of advice.

[hunglowandbig]

This is going to sounded very jaded, but it’s true. Most people are too self interested to care about how their indiscretion may effect another, especially providers. Clients don’t have to live with the consequences like we do. Some clients are naive and some just don’t value/respect women or providers. I’m too busy staying in my lane and worrying about my life and safety to care about what’s going on in other people’s worlds, for the most part. If you are not intelligent enough to discuss things and not people, please pass me on by. If I hear someone discussing someone’s business, that tells me how they’ll discuss me.

Everyone deserves mutual respect and discretion, unless they are a danger and hurting people. Even then, a lot of thought must be put into wether an alert or alleged danger should be posted and how etc.

My nickel’s worth of advice.

I agree!!!! Like to add if a provider is bb a client i think it’s fair game for the community to know that puts the entire community in danger . That my 2 cents !

[Raikage]

YMMV YMMV YMMV People need to know this and get it through their thick skulls. If a provider gives you an unexpected benefit and she tells you to shut up about it ... do it.
You're only ruining your benefits when you try to impose or lie to get the same benefit from another provider, nobody owes you shit.
Every provider will not provide the same service and no, not every provider/client needs to know what other providers/clients do (unless they are doing really dangerous stuff like abusing injectable illegal substances), the whole safety argument is bullshit as I would bet 1000$ that these providers are all doing (forbidden subject) with other dudes/ladies they fancy, especially the ones who say they would ban clients of providers who secretly or openly offer it.

Be responsible, be smart, get tested regularly, if you are no longer safe then fucking retire, that goes for both clients and providers.

[F117]

This is going to sounded very jaded, but it’s true. Most people are too self interested to care about how their indiscretion may effect another, especially providers. Clients don’t have to live with the consequences like we do. Some clients are naive and some just don’t value/respect women or providers. I’m too busy staying in my lane and worrying about my life and safety to care about what’s going on in other people’s worlds, for the most part. If you are not intelligent enough to discuss things and not people, please pass me on by. If I hear someone discussing someone’s business, that tells me how they’ll discuss me.

Everyone deserves mutual respect and discretion, unless they are a danger and hurting people. Even then, a lot of thought must be put into wether an alert or alleged danger should be posted and how etc.

My nickel’s worth of advice.

AMEN! A provider who gets it!

- - - Updated - - -

Be responsible, be smart, get tested regularly, if you are no longer safe then fucking retire, that goes for both clients and providers.

AND a client who gets it! Good to see that there are some emotionally mature folks on this board!

[Adonisman]

Good luck with all that,, its not going to ever happen. There is so much back channel conversations in the under belly of this hobby.. If you do not want your business being talked about. Find another hobby. Providers talk about Johns and Johns talk about Providers.. nature of the beast...