Jeff Foxworthy in Kabul
"YOU MAY BE A MEMBER OF THE TALIBAN IF...."
1. You refine heroin for a living, but you have a moral objection to liquor.
2. You own a $3,000 machine gun and $5,000 rocket launcher, but you can't
afford shoes.
3. You have more wives than teeth.
4. You wipe your butt with your bare left hand, but consider bacon
"unclean."
5. You think vests come in two types: bullet-proof and suicide.
6. You can't think of anyone you haven't declared Jihad against.
7. You consider television dangerous, but routinely carry explosives in your
clothing.
8. You were amazed to discover that cell phones have other uses than setting
off roadside bombs.
9. You have nothing against women and think every man should own at least
four of them.
10. For some time you've always had a crush on your neighbor's goat.
11. Your cousin is President of the United States
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