If someone asks you for the truth...do you give it?

I am really interested to hear people's thoughts on this, given a recent post elsewhere.

If someone asks you a question that is a direct request for the truth...do you tell them (the truth) no matter what it is?

It doesn't matter if it's "Does my arse look big in these?" "Did you fuck her?" ...etc...would you tell the truth if asked?

As I said before, I'm not laboring under any misapprehension that we all tell the truth all the time....but how much truth do we tell when asked?

I totally understand that the truth can be tough to hear, but two things come to mind before lying ever would:

i) They asked for the truth. I assume if they ask for it, they want. If I ask for the truth, I expect to get...well the truth otherwise I wouldnt ask!!!

ii) If it's a sensitive subject, it is possible to be honest with being a complete shit. Honestly, I think some people are untruthful with their responses not because they think the truth will hurt too much, but because they dont know (or want to know) how to be honest.

I'm not down with this bullshit of reading between the lines and over analyzing people. Tell me what you want and hey..I'll do my best. I genuinely appreciate directness. For the record, I detest (with big "D"'s) reading between the lines and trying to figure people out. Sorry, if you havent walked in my shoes then...you can't.

Ok...bed time for me...give me something interesting to ponder tomorrow....I'm particularly interested in hearing from the men.

Kisses

Camille xxxx

You gonna hate my answer, Camille! But my answer is...

"It depends."

I try VERY hard to live my life K.I.S.S. I probably fail more often than I succeed but that's the goal.

When it comes to applying K.I.S.S. to direct communication, all I ask from those I allow close enough to question me at all is the following:

1. Ask me whatever you wish! I reserve the right not to answer... at least not right now... You'll KNOW when I'm doing this. I'll say, "I rather not say.." OR, "I'd rather not discuss that now..."
2. Never ask me a question you don't REALLY want answered.

If somebody "comes correct" in that regard, then - yes - I answer directly & let the chips fall where they may. If not, I still may answer directly even if I think my response will hurt... but only if they leave me no other way out.

I know how to tell the truth. I know how NOT to hurt people. I don't always know how to do both at the same time.

Gotta go with Sis on this...It Depends.

First I guess it would depend on how well I know someone. I don't really mind saying something that is not favorable...but I have to see some upside in it. Are they really being serious that they want to know the truth? If they know the truth is it going to make a positive difference? Is my answer more likely to harm them or me? If it is only me I can be more honest.

Its the inbetween people who are the most difficult to deal with on a tough question. Someone you barely know is probably not worth the effort of getting too worked up about being too truthful with a tough question. Be truthful and let the chips fall where they may...or keep your mouth shut. Who cares? Someone you know really well is probably more able to accept a tough answer. They already know the depth of your affection. But the in between peson is a bit tougher. They may not be as comfortable with my answer...and I have no intent to harm. But being false is not good either. So, it is a crap shoot...it just depends on the question or the answer.

Like most things in life...There are no simple answers.

Whatever prompts you to ask such a question? :D

<div class='quotetop'>QUOTE (Rudyard K @ Mar 24 2009, 10:38 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}></div>

Quote:

---

Whatever prompts you to ask such a question? :D[/b]

---

:D I assume you know her well enough to ask the question!!!

I&#39;ll cop to thinking it... but wasn&#39;t gonna ask!!! :P

<div class='quotetop'>QUOTE (Sisyphus @ Mar 24 2009, 10:57 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}></div>

Quote:

---

:D I assume you know her well enough to ask the question!!!

I&#39;ll cop to thinking it... but wasn&#39;t gonna ask!!! :P[/b]

---

It was a post elsewhere...where this question of honesty came up.
It got me thinking that&#39;s all. :huh:

I have tried to think of someone that I dont know too well...who has asked me to be honest with about something.
Can&#39;t actually think of anyone (maybe we just don&#39;t ask that of someone we are not close to...I know I don&#39;t which is why I expect the truth from those I&#39;m close to)....so I don&#39;t have experience to share there. That said, I&#39;m sure I&#39;d go the route of the two of you...which is to say nothing. I&#39;ll agree with that. Perhaps I should have asked my question in the context of someone you deeply like/love/respect...etc.
I&#39;m sure there are times over the years where my mother has (initially) wished I had lied to her about a whole manner of things...and I bet a few boyfriends too. But what I&#39;ve come to learn is that whilst the truth hurts, lies hurt more (and usually for longer)...I know that from my own experience. I would never want anyone to deal with unecessary pain or hurt and in the grand scheme of things, I genuinely do believe that honesty will usually prevail especially if solicited.

Ok...plane to catch...thank goodness it is warmer there than "here." :lol:

Kisses

C xxx

Very good question , Camille!!

Sisyphus and Rudyard K have already stolen my thunder.... excellent replies, each!

I concur !!

Giz

<div class='quotetop'>QUOTE (Rudyard K @ Mar 24 2009, 11:38 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}></div>

Quote:

---

Gotta go with Sis on this...It Depends.

First I guess it would depend on how well I know someone. I don&#39;t really mind saying something that is not favorable...but I have to see some upside in it. Are they really being serious that they want to know the truth? If they know the truth is it going to make a positive difference? Is my answer more likely to harm them or me? If it is only me I can be more honest.

Its the inbetween people who are the most difficult to deal with on a tough question. Someone you barely know is probably not worth the effort of getting too worked up about being too truthful with a tough question. Be truthful and let the chips fall where they may...or keep your mouth shut. Who cares? Someone you know really well is probably more able to accept a tough answer. They already know the depth of your affection. But the in between peson is a bit tougher. They may not be as comfortable with my answer...and I have no intent to harm. But being false is not good either. So, it is a crap shoot...it just depends on the question or the answer.

Like most things in life...There are no simple answers.

Whatever prompts you to ask such a question? :D[/b]

---

Best Answer.

People lie for selfish reasons. Telling the truth takes a lot more time, energy & emotional currency. It is n0t so much a matter of hurting someone&#39;s feelings but the subsequent follow-on discussions after telling the truth trying to clarify your point of view and often helping the person you&#39;ve told the truth too take corrective action.

Then there are things where it just makes no sense to tell the truth. Of course the new parents&#39; baby is gorgeous.....and even if it looks like WTF, why give them a complex. There is a good chance it grows into a nice normal looking kid.

<div class='quotetop'>QUOTE (Camille @ Mar 24 2009, 10:50 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}></div>

Quote:

---

"Does my arse look big in these?" "Did you fuck her?"[/b]

---

No. Yes.

<div class='quotetop'>QUOTE (Camille @ Mar 25 2009, 05:22 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}></div>

Quote:

---

It was a post elsewhere...where this question of honesty came up.[/b]

---

Elsewhere... there&#39;s an "elsewhere"??? Does EVERYBODY know about this?!?!?!? :P

<div class='quotetop'>QUOTE (Camille @ Mar 25 2009, 05:22 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}></div>

Quote:

---

Perhaps I should have asked my question in the context of someone you deeply like/love/respect...etc.[/b]

---

Hopefully, it doesn&#39;t change the crux of my answer much but it certainly changes the "calculus" that goes into each decision. For example, in THIS context I disagree with your original premise that it makes NO difference if the question is

"Does this make my arse look big?" vs. "Did you fuck her?"

It makes all the difference in the world!!!! :D

When you know somebody THAT well you have to take into account the dynamic you have with the person doing the asking. Is the person doing the asking "straight ahead" enough to simply be seeking information? Or, is it somebody who has something else in mind? IOW, you have to factor in whether the question that was spoken out loud is REALLY the question that&#39;s being asked.

What do I mean by that? Well, in the case of the first question, it could be anything from:

"I KNOW my arse looks great/awful. Will YOU tell me my arse looks great/awful?"

to

"Do I matter enough to you for you to handle me gently - BUT NOT LIE - when I&#39;m not feeling particularly good about myself?"

As for the second question... Jesus! Books have been written on all the permutations....

I agree that it is better NOT to lie but whether you tell the truth or refuse to answer... it&#39;s as much about HOW you do so as it is WHAT you do. You can refuse to answer in a curt or dismissive manner. Or, you can explain WHY you&#39;re not going to answer in a positive manner. You can tell the truth bluntly. OR, you can explain that an unpleasant truth really isn&#39;t that significant BEFORE you give it.

I didn&#39;t see the "R-word" (ie, relationship) in your question anywhere but it sounded to me like that&#39;s what was on your mind. Successful relationships are built on intimacy. Intimacy is built on trust. You can&#39;t be intimate with somebody you don&#39;t trust.

In that sense, lying is a terrible strategy. But then again, so it asking questions that put the other person "on the spot" all the time! :D

<div class='quotetop'>QUOTE (Camille @ Mar 25 2009, 05:22 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}></div>

Quote:

---

Ok...plane to catch...thank goodness it is warmer there than "here." :lol:

Kisses

C xxx[/b]

---

Off you go! Safe travels!!! Warmer "here" but not necessarily nicer... looks like a steady diet of t-storms for us all week....

OK, not sure if this applies but we are on a discussion board. We discuss a variety of things and we all have differing opinions. So we all have varying forms of what we consider the truth. Science or fact based question are another topic altogether. They have known universal truths.

So when asked if her ass is to big, of course it is left up to discretion. Did you fuc her...again, discretion. But when having a discussion about say gays and specifically whether laws on the book effect them negatively economically. Should you tell the asker of that question the truth? I say absolutely. If they in fact asked, stated they did not believe in economic discrimination and then when confronted with that very fact....that they indeed do support economic discrimination by supporting such laws, they change the tone to one of what a psychopath YOU are. Now that may very well be true lol but it has nothing to do with whether one supports economic discrimination. So we are back to RK point of i-s it really worth telling someone that you barely know on the internet the truth-.....even a universal truth. I say yes but completely understand RK train of thought in &#39;&#39;what&#39;s the point.&#39;&#39;.....I&#39;ve had it cross my mind more than once concerning Ms Cole inquiry.

Rent "12 Angry Men" to see where you might stand on this issue http://www.cheathouse.com/essay/essay_view..._essay_id=11588

All that said there is a vast array of expertise in varying fields on this board....I would have been gone long ago if every poster agreed for the sake of unity and did not share their knowledge, somewhat truthfully hopefully. So really if you gotta ask if your ass is getting big the problem does not lie (pardon the pun) in the answer it lies in the question.


<div class='quotetop'>QUOTE (atlcomedy @ Mar 25 2009, 08:09 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}></div>

Quote:

---

Of course the new parents&#39; baby is gorgeous.....and even if it looks like WTF, why give them a complex. There is a good chance it grows into a nice normal looking kid.[/b]

---

Hey now Atl...I was a good looking baby boy.....I just grew up to be a ugly asshole!

Another thing to consider is... how complicated do you want it to be, to live with your answer?

To lie... or tell the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth... depends on how complicated of an answer you&#39;re giving to the question.

As we all know.... it&#39;s a hell of a lot easier to remember the truth, and be able to repeat it, perfectly.... than it is to remember "which lie did I use"?

Giz

Then , of course.... How Big of a hole do you want to dig for yourself?

When asked "Honey... do these jeans make my ass look big" ?
You may want to take a little time before you answer "No Baby... I think your ass makes those jeans look big"!! B)

Giz

My memory sucks so I have to tell the truth. I do try not to be hurtful in my answer though. There is a difference between being honest and just mean!

Chipper

<div class='quotetop'>QUOTE (Sisyphus @ Mar 24 2009, 10:05 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}></div>

Quote:

---

You gonna hate my answer, Camille! But my answer is...

"It depends."

I try VERY hard to live my life K.I.S.S. I probably fail more often than I succeed but that&#39;s the goal.

When it comes to applying K.I.S.S. to direct communication, all I ask from those I allow close enough to question me at all is the following:

1. Ask me whatever you wish! I reserve the right not to answer... at least not right now... You&#39;ll KNOW when I&#39;m doing this. I&#39;ll say, "I rather not say.." OR, "I&#39;d rather not discuss that now..."
2. Never ask me a question you don&#39;t REALLY want answered.

If somebody "comes correct" in that regard, then - yes - I answer directly & let the chips fall where they may. If not, I still may answer directly even if I think my response will hurt... but only if they leave me no other way out.

I know how to tell the truth. I know how NOT to hurt people. I don&#39;t always know how to do both at the same time.[/b]

---

I&#39;m with you Sisyphus, and agree that the K.I.S.S method works best for me also.

I prefer others be honest and direct with me, however it depends on the question and the recipient as to my response to a specific question. Generally, I "tactfully" tell the truth, unless it&#39;s going to hurt their feelings.

<div class='quotetop'>QUOTE (Kay Sommers @ Mar 25 2009, 06:51 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}></div>

Quote:

---

I&#39;m with you Sisyphus...[/b]

---

Why thank you, &#39;mam!!!

NICE pic!!!

Alas... "with you" in this case... JUST a figure of speech! ;)

<div class='quotetop'>QUOTE (Sisyphus @ Mar 25 2009, 08:41 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}></div>

Quote:

---

When you know somebody THAT well you have to take into account the dynamic you have with the person doing the asking. Is the person doing the asking "straight ahead" enough to simply be seeking information? Or, is it somebody who has something else in mind? IOW, you have to factor in whether the question that was spoken out loud is REALLY the question that&#39;s being asked.[/b]

---

Now this is interesting...because this is exactly what I mean when I say "reading between the lines."
If I don&#39;t know someone well enough...I won&#39;t invest that much time in over analayzing them.
If I do know someone well enough then I sort of assume they know me too...and if they ask for the truth..they want the truth.
What is this trying to figure out ulterior motives thing? FWIW...I&#39;m not disagreeing with you at all Sisyphus...I see lots of people doing this and so I know you are making a valid point. Why bloody ask if you want a lie? I mean...????
ATL makes an interesting point about having to invest too much time into telling the truth and that it&#39;s selfishness that prevents it.
PJ...love your concise answers as always and Mr. Giz at least one of your responses had me laughing hard, but I&#39;m still a novice on here so I don&#39;t know how to lift multiple quotes into 1 thread lol. :lol:

BTW...who&#39;s idea was the Tornado warning??? I&#39;m trying to get away from crappy weather thanks lol :P

Sleep well peeps

C xxxx

<div class='quotetop'>QUOTE (Rudyard K @ Mar 24 2009, 10:38 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}></div>

Quote:

---

Gotta go with Sis on this...It Depends.

First I guess it would depend on how well I know someone. I don&#39;t really mind saying something that is not favorable...but I have to see some upside in it. Are they really being serious that they want to know the truth? If they know the truth is it going to make a positive difference? Is my answer more likely to harm them or me? If it is only me I can be more honest.

I knew there was a reason I liked you ;)

Its the inbetween people who are the most difficult to deal with on a tough question. Someone you barely know is probably not worth the effort of getting too worked up about being too truthful with a tough question. Be truthful and let the chips fall where they may...or keep your mouth shut. Who cares?

Yes...I wasnt really talking about them...but I didnt make that clear.

Someone you know really well is probably more able to accept a tough answer. They already know the depth of your affection. But the in between peson is a bit tougher. They may not be as comfortable with my answer...and I have no intent to harm. But being false is not good either. So, it is a crap shoot...it just depends on the question or the answer.

Like most things in life...There are no simple answers.

But you can&#39;t always take the easy route just because it&#39;s....well easy ;)[/b]

---

<div class='quotetop'>QUOTE (Camille @ Mar 25 2009, 11:02 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}></div>

Quote:

---

Now this is interesting...because this is exactly what I mean when I say "reading between the lines."
If I don&#39;t know someone well enough...I won&#39;t invest that much time in over analayzing them.
If I do know someone well enough then I sort of assume they know me too...and if they ask for the truth..they want the truth.
What is this trying to figure out ulterior motives thing? FWIW...I&#39;m not disagreeing with you at all Sisyphus...I see lots of people doing this and so I know you are making a valid point. Why bloody ask if you want a lie? I mean...????[/b]

---

I don&#39;t see it that way! Disagreeing with me, that is....

But I also don&#39;t necessarily see those who ask these sorts of questions as "wanting a lie." What I THINK they want... is affirmation that they&#39;ve been "understood." IE, you KNOW me well enough to understand what I&#39;m REALLY asking and you know me well enough to provide the "RIGHT" answer. Is it a form of passive-aggressive behavior? Probably... Whether you choose to tolerate it or not is a pretty strong indicator as to your level of interest... which is probably what all of it is REALLY about anyway....

I think you & I sort of look at things the same way in that regard. If you ask me something... it&#39;s BECAUSE you want information. If I ask you something... it&#39;s BECAUSE I want information....

I get ripped all the time by the people in my life for not "communicating" enough. My reply... if you can&#39;t/won&#39;t TELL me anything I don&#39;t ALREADY know... why should I bother? Sorry, but that&#39;s the way it is.

Fact of the matter, Love, most of the REST of this world doesn&#39;t look at it the way we do. So, whether you think it makes sense or not... if you give a shit about the person doing the asking... what the "real" question is...it&#39;s part of the calculus...

Unless you want to blow them off or piss them off, it&#39;s part of the game.

<div class='quotetop'>QUOTE (Camille @ Mar 25 2009, 11:02 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}></div>

Quote:

---

BTW...who&#39;s idea was the Tornado warning??? I&#39;m trying to get away from crappy weather thanks lol :P

Sleep well peeps

C xxxx[/b]

---

LOL... I TRIED to warn you... welcome to spring time travel... south mid-western style....

I&#39;m only posting this after sitting in the dark for over an hour. At this point, bring on the damn tornado... as long as I can see it coming!!!

The truth is a precious thing not to be wasted.

If it&#39;s a question that&#39;s not their business, don&#39;t tell the truth unless it&#39;s in your best interest to do so.

If it&#39;s a loaded question such as "Do I look fat," don&#39;t tell the truth. I like to respond, "Do I look stupid?"

If it&#39;s a question that the person has a right to be asking, tell the truth.

<div class='quotetop'>QUOTE (Camille @ Mar 25 2009, 11:02 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}></div>

Quote:

---

BTW...who&#39;s idea was the Tornado warning??? I&#39;m trying to get away from crappy weather thanks lol :P[/b]

---

Welcome to Texas! At least it&#39;s not Florida and Hurricane season...but what&#39;s the difference if your in the middle of it.? Good thing it was gone as fast as it came, right?

<div class='quotetop'>QUOTE (Sisyphus @ Mar 25 2009, 10:36 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}></div>

Quote:

---

Unless you want to blow them off or piss them off, it&#39;s part of the game.[/b]

---

Um yes...that&#39;s a bit familiar.
Story to tell about this whole thing...but later not now.

<div class='quotetop'>QUOTE (Woody of TX @ Mar 26 2009, 10:57 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}></div>

Quote:

---

Welcome to Texas! At least it&#39;s not Florida and Hurricane season...[/b]

---

Shhhh!!!!! Dont say that so loud. I&#39;m still recovering from 2004.

<div class='quotetop'>QUOTE (Camille @ Mar 26 2009, 12:02 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}></div>

Quote:

---

PJ...love your concise answers as always[/b]

---

I try to please darlin. ;)

<div class='quotetop'>QUOTE (Camille @ Mar 26 2009, 10:04 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}></div>

Quote:

---

Um yes...that&#39;s a bit familiar.
Story to tell about this whole thing...but later not now.[/b]

---

:D I got that impression.... must have read between the lines! :P

No rush... take your time... whenever you&#39;re ready you can...

Climb up on the big comfy couch & tell ole&#39; Uncle Sys ALL about it! ;)

At times around hereI feel like Jack in &#39;&#39;A Few Good Men&#39;&#39; . My momma alwys says "Ask my lil sweet boy WTF, if you want the brutal truth".

Jessep: You want answers?
Kaffee (Tom Cruise): I think I&#39;m entitled to them.
Jessep: You want answers?
Kaffee: I want the truth!
Jessep: You can&#39;t handle the truth!


Camille here is a nice little article on lying that I wrote about in Forbes. I wish I had more time to go into detail about all this lying but I have a meeting with the Pope. Wish me luck on changing his mind on that condom thing.

http://www.forbes.com/2005/10/19/lying-dis...05_1024lie.html

What&#39;s more, we lie all the time. . .

. . . In fact, we lie so readily that the dishonesty becomes automatic. . .

. . . But why are we so dishonest so often? Isn’t honesty always the best policy? In fact, no. Nobody wants to hear that they look heavier or less attractive. In truth, we consider those who are too honest to be blunt, antisocial and even pathological. A recent study found that adolescents who are most popular with their peers were the ones that were the best at being deceptive.

<div class='quotetop'>QUOTE (WTF @ Mar 26 2009, 02:20 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}></div>

Quote:

---

At times around hereI feel like Jack in &#39;&#39;A Few Good Men&#39;&#39; . My momma alwys says "Ask my lil sweet boy WTF, if you want the brutal truth".

Jessep: You want answers?
Kaffee (Tom Cruise): I think I&#39;m entitled to them.
Jessep: You want answers?
Kaffee: I want the truth!
Jessep: You can&#39;t handle the truth!


Camille here is a nice little article on lying that I wrote about in Forbes. I wish I had more time to go into detail about all this lying but I have a meeting with the Pope. Wish me luck on changing his mind on that condom thing.

http://www.forbes.com/2005/10/19/lying-dis...05_1024lie.html

What&#39;s more, we lie all the time. . .

. . . In fact, we lie so readily that the dishonesty becomes automatic. . .

. . . But why are we so dishonest so often? Isn’t honesty always the best policy? In fact, no. Nobody wants to hear that they look heavier or less attractive. In truth, we consider those who are too honest to be blunt, antisocial and even pathological. A recent study found that adolescents who are most popular with their peers were the ones that were the best at being deceptive.[/b]

---

Don&#39;t believe everything academics tell ya WTF....they lie :P

<div class='quotetop'>QUOTE (WTF @ Mar 26 2009, 02:20 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}></div>

Quote:

---

A recent study found that adolescents who are most popular with their peers were the ones that were the best at being deceptive.[/b]

---

Didn&#39;t 4 out of 5 dentists recommend Crest too? :rolleyes:

<div class='quotetop'>QUOTE (Camille @ Mar 27 2009, 01:24 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}></div>

Quote:

---

Don&#39;t believe everything academics tell ya WTF....they lie :P[/b]

---

Well then Jim Carey&#39;s Oscar for "Liar, Liar" is starting to make sense......





<div class='quotetop'>QUOTE (Rudyard K @ Mar 27 2009, 01:57 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}></div>

Quote:

---

Didn&#39;t 4 out of 5 dentists recommend Crest too? :rolleyes:[/b]

---

Three out of those four were found to be OBGYN&#39;s and the fourth was a Proctologist (isn&#39;t there alway&#39;s a asshole in the bunch)....Conjurer&#39;s up a whole new image to "Look Ma, no cavities!"

Love without honesty is hypocrisy,
Honesty without love is brutality.

:)

I struggle with the idea of truth often, since my life is supported by a fine web of lies or half truths (I don&#39;t really distinguish between the two). Not only due to this lifestyle, but bi-sexuality, my spiritual beliefs, and my romantic adventures. Co-workers, casual friends, relatives are acquainted with only vague shadow of who I am. I treasure those whom I can be honest with and accept me whole heartedly - they are agonizingly rare. Locked in a discussion on this very topic with my closest friend, I described it as being alone in a crowded room.

When I do not want to give the truth, I reply with silence. Surprisingly, when met with silence, most people back off. Most.

In the case of a situation like "Did you fuck him? " I&#39;ll be honest. If I&#39;m willing to commit the crime I&#39;ve already accepted the possibility I&#39;ll get caught. When directly asked, I&#39;ll tell the truth.

When a family member asked me "You&#39;re hiding something from us, what is it?" I have no question in my mind that they wanted the truth. I chose the path of deny, deny, deny. Out of selfish self preservation. If they knew the truth, they&#39;d harass me to death trying to change my ways - and that isn&#39;t going to happen. My only option would be to cut them off entirely, which would pain them deeply. They took other truths poorly, and I nearly had to change my name before they understood that nothing could be done about it.

In the name of peace, I believe I have a right to secrecy and even lies. When there is nothing that can be done to convince me otherwise, I&#39;ll choose the path of least resistance. I have but one life to live, and I don&#39;t want anyone interfering with how I live it. I won&#39;t lie because the truth is painful, or because I&#39;m afraid of loosing soemone. I will lie only if I know the other party will wreak havoc on my sanity or poses a threat to the delicate balance of my life.

<div class='quotetop'>QUOTE (Sisyphus @ Mar 24 2009, 10:05 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}></div>

Quote:

---

I know how to tell the truth. I know how NOT to hurt people. I don&#39;t always know how to do both at the same time.[/b]

---

It isn&#39;t always possible.

What about those instances when people want to be lied to? They don&#39;t really want the truth, they want to be reassured of a fantasy they love?

"What am I supposed to do
When it&#39;s all a lie
Won&#39;t you lie to me, lie to me baby
Lie to me, lie to me baby
Won&#39;t you lie to me baby
One last time"

I know a gent who has an unspoken understanding with his SO. He wanted to confess to seeing other women, crushed by a sense of guilt. She stopped the conversation dead it&#39;s tracks, she doesn&#39;t ever want to discuss the subject. She would rather he lie to her, knowing it&#39;s all a veil, and continue to live the life she has always known.

<div class='quotetop'>QUOTE (Lauren Summerhill @ Mar 27 2009, 10:21 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}></div>

Quote:

---

Love without honesty is hypocrisy,
Honesty without love is brutality.[/b]

---

Maybe that&#39;s my problem....I love people. Without it being reciprocated my comments are taken by some as brutal. Make&#39;s sense.

<div class='quotetop'>QUOTE (WTF @ Mar 27 2009, 11:08 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}></div>

Quote:

---

Without it being reciprocated my comments are taken by some as brutal.[/b]

---

Without a link ;) please explain what you are saying.

<div class='quotetop'>QUOTE (Ansley Ayers @ Mar 27 2009, 12:58 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}></div>

Quote:

---

Without a link ;) please explain what you are saying.[/b]

---

Ans, Ans, Ans... you KNOW better that that!!

Ssssshhhhh!!!!

ix-nay, ix-nay on the splain-exay.....


If we&#39;re tossing out lyrics on the subject....

"Tell me lies, I know the truth but tell me lies
Just like a breath of fresh air blowin&#39; through my lonely spirit
Love thing, well being
Love thing"

<div class='quotetop'>QUOTE (Ansley Ayers @ Mar 27 2009, 12:58 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}></div>

Quote:

---

Without a link ;) please explain what you are saying.[/b]

---

I luv all you guys....yet some may not love me back in kind and thus think my comments are brutal.

Take that Sisyphus :P

<div class='quotetop'>QUOTE (Ansley Ayers @ Mar 27 2009, 12:58 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}></div>

Quote:

---

Without a link ;) please explain what you are saying.[/b]

---

Is it miracle day? ~smile~

<div class='quotetop'>QUOTE (Woody of TX @ Mar 27 2009, 03:46 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}></div>

Quote:

---

Is it miracle day? ~smile~[/b]

---

Woody I paid that Stew a thousand bucks to rattle your chain, if that hadn&#39;t worked I&#39;d cranked up a crying baby! lol

<div class='quotetop'>QUOTE (WTF @ Mar 27 2009, 02:43 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}></div>

Quote:

---

I luv all you guys....[/b]

---

As long as you use the word luv. I don&#39;t like it when people throw the word "love" around. That is a very serious word and is not used or taken lightly with me.

<div class='quotetop'>QUOTE (Ansley Ayers @ Mar 27 2009, 03:56 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}></div>

Quote:

---

As long as you use the word luv. I don&#39;t like it when people throw the word "love" around. That is a very serious word and is not used or taken lightly with me.[/b]

---

I&#39;d love to fuc all you ladies. :P How&#39;s that?

Did my answer make sense??? Inquiring minds want to grow!

<div class='quotetop'>QUOTE (WTF @ Mar 27 2009, 02:58 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}></div>

Quote:

---

I&#39;d love to fuc all you ladies. :P[/b]

---

Now I know that&#39;s a lie! ;)

Some differing views about lies. :D
----------------
If She have spoken a word, remember thy lips are sealed,
And the Brand of the Dog is upon him by whom is the secret revealed.
If She have written a letter, delay not an instant, but burn it.
Tear it to pieces, O Fool, and the wind to her mate shall return it!
If there be trouble to Herward, and a lie of the blackest can clear,
Lie, while thy lips can move or a man is alive to hear.
----------------
One lie leads to another lie a wise one once did say
And you must tell another lie tomorrow for the lie you told today
The truth is always better the truth will set you free
Of the sort of guilt that those who lie live with or so &#39;twould seem to me.

&#39;Tis easy to be evasive and &#39;tis easy for to lie
But the person who tells you the truth can look you in the eye
And tell you as you should be told with them you know where you stand
People like them earn your respect and trust since about them nothing underhand.

Those who find it easy for to cheat and lie have lost their sense of fair play
What goes around always comes around they don&#39;t see it that way
They do not believe in karma and cannot see wrong in their dishonesty
In trustworthiness in others a weakness they only see.

One lie leads to another lie and some for financial gain
Will cause hardship to others and how can one explain
How some people can cheat and lie and not feel any guilt or shame
But Humanity is made of all kinds of people and no two are the same.
----------------
If to save yourself from serious injury or death to lie is not a shame
For that&#39;s self preservation and for that none you should blame
With someone pointing a loaded gun at you then your life you will save
Not to lie at such a time more suicidal than brave
To lie to save your life does seem okay
For who would wish to die in such a violent way
And what use is hero status to a dead woman or man
The idea is to live for as long as you can
At such a time to be brave is suicidal why should one wish to die
There&#39;s a time for truth and there&#39;s a time for to lie
And to lie on such an occasion could never be wrong
For to embrace life is a gift of the strong
When lying does save your life then to lie is okay
And there is a time to lie despite what some might say.
-----------------
What exactly is a lie?
And who exactly do we lie to?
A lie is supposedly something hurtful
And anyone can lie to you

Yet it seems almost obvious
That we can never tell the truth
It&#39;s almost like a career
Like those guys who work the sales booth

They lie right between their teeth
And they can actually look you in the eye
And say what they want
Without ever sounding sly

Is it really that easy to do?
Can it really be done so fast?
Well I believe it is easy
If it doesn&#39;t leave a blast

Lying is an art
One that is easy to nurture
It is suppose to eat at your concious
It&#39;s suppose to be torture

But that&#39;s only if you lie
To someone you don&#39;t really know
But what if you lie to someone
And they took it as a blow

I mean, for instance, your best friend
Someone who is always there
Who always tries to protect you
No matter what burdens you bear

I mean, is it wrong if you lie to her?
Without a reason of ever doing so?
Or is the fact that you are trying to protect yourself
Good enough reason to just let it go?

I don&#39;t know what it is
But now I&#39;m starting to think
Since now it&#39;s confirmed that you have done it before
Will you do it again? Lying to me without so much as a wink or a blink?

I hold you in such high esteem
I look out for you no matter what
So a little advice to keep our friendship intact
Next time you want to lie to me, Just keep your mouth SHUT!

<div class='quotetop'>QUOTE (Rudyard K @ Mar 27 2009, 05:55 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}></div>

Quote:

---

Some differing views about lies. :D
----------------
If She have spoken a word, remember thy lips are sealed,
And the Brand of the Dog is upon him by whom is the secret revealed.
If She have written a letter, delay not an instant, but burn it.
Tear it to pieces, O Fool, and the wind to her mate shall return it!
If there be trouble to Herward, and a lie of the blackest can clear,
Lie, while thy lips can move or a man is alive to hear.
----------------
One lie leads to another lie a wise one once did say
And you must tell another lie tomorrow for the lie you told today
The truth is always better the truth will set you free
Of the sort of guilt that those who lie live with or so &#39;twould seem to me.

&#39;Tis easy to be evasive and &#39;tis easy for to lie
But the person who tells you the truth can look you in the eye
And tell you as you should be told with them you know where you stand
People like them earn your respect and trust since about them nothing underhand.

Those who find it easy for to cheat and lie have lost their sense of fair play
What goes around always comes around they don&#39;t see it that way
They do not believe in karma and cannot see wrong in their dishonesty
In trustworthiness in others a weakness they only see.

One lie leads to another lie and some for financial gain
Will cause hardship to others and how can one explain
How some people can cheat and lie and not feel any guilt or shame
But Humanity is made of all kinds of people and no two are the same.
----------------
If to save yourself from serious injury or death to lie is not a shame
For that&#39;s self preservation and for that none you should blame
With someone pointing a loaded gun at you then your life you will save
Not to lie at such a time more suicidal than brave
To lie to save your life does seem okay
For who would wish to die in such a violent way
And what use is hero status to a dead woman or man
The idea is to live for as long as you can
At such a time to be brave is suicidal why should one wish to die
There&#39;s a time for truth and there&#39;s a time for to lie
And to lie on such an occasion could never be wrong
For to embrace life is a gift of the strong
When lying does save your life then to lie is okay
And there is a time to lie despite what some might say.
-----------------
What exactly is a lie?
And who exactly do we lie to?
A lie is supposedly something hurtful
And anyone can lie to you

Yet it seems almost obvious
That we can never tell the truth
It&#39;s almost like a career
Like those guys who work the sales booth

They lie right between their teeth
And they can actually look you in the eye
And say what they want
Without ever sounding sly

Is it really that easy to do?
Can it really be done so fast?
Well I believe it is easy
If it doesn&#39;t leave a blast

Lying is an art
One that is easy to nurture
It is suppose to eat at your concious
It&#39;s suppose to be torture

But that&#39;s only if you lie
To someone you don&#39;t really know
But what if you lie to someone
And they took it as a blow

I mean, for instance, your best friend
Someone who is always there
Who always tries to protect you
No matter what burdens you bear

I mean, is it wrong if you lie to her?
Without a reason of ever doing so?
Or is the fact that you are trying to protect yourself
Good enough reason to just let it go?

I don&#39;t know what it is
But now I&#39;m starting to think
Since now it&#39;s confirmed that you have done it before
Will you do it again? Lying to me without so much as a wink or a blink?

I hold you in such high esteem
I look out for you no matter what
So a little advice to keep our friendship intact
Next time you want to lie to me, Just keep your mouth SHUT![/b]

---

Do you really think anyone is going to read all that? I like WTF&#39;s links better. They are easier to ignore and take up less space. :lol: