Tired of constantly being broke & stuck in an unhappy
marriage, a young husband decided to solve both problems by taking out a
large insurance policy on his wife with himself as the beneficiary, and
then arranging to have her killed.
A 'friend of a friend' put him in touch with a
nefarious dark-side underworld figure who went by the name of 'Artie.'
Artie then explained to the husband that his going price
for snuffing out a spouse was $5,000.
The husband said he was willing to pay that amount, but
that he wouldn't have any cash on hand until he could collect his wife's
insurance money.
Artie insisted on being paid at least something up front,
so the man opened his wallet, displaying the single dollar bill that
rested inside. Artie sighed, rolled his eyes, &reluctantly agreed to
accept the dollar as down payment for the dirty deed.
A few days later, Artie followed the man's wife to the
local Super Wal-Mart store. There, he surprised her in the produce
department &proceeded to strangle her with his gloved hands &as the poor
unsuspecting woman drew her last breath &slumped to the floor........
The manager of the produce department stumbled
unexpectedly onto the murder scene. Unwilling to leave any living
witnesses behind, ol' Artie had no choice but to strangle the produce
manager as well.
However, unknown to Artie, the entire proceedings were
captured by the hidden security cameras &observed by the store's
security guard, who immediately called the police. Artie was caught
&arrested before he could even leave the store.
Under intense questioning at the police station, Artie
revealed the whole sordid plan, including his unusual financial
arrangements with the hapless husband who was also quickly arrested.
The next day in the newspaper, the headline declared ...
'ARTIE CHOKES 2 for $1.00 AT WAL-MART!'